Broken Rules
by Lurisa
Summary: Oneshot...Draco and Hermione...Hermion's point of view...that's pretty much it...read and review...rated because it's how I rate everything...


**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but the plot. Draco, Hermione and all other _Harry Potter_ affiliated things you recognize belong to the talented JK Rowling. Anything you recognize that doesn't fit under the term _Harry Potter affiliated_ belongs to its respective owners. It was not my intention not to give proper due to those who deserve it.

Author's Note: This story is written kind of funny. It shifts quickly from time to time but it's in chronological order. At the end of each section there is this thing: … That means that I'm shifting into another time. I don't really know what to make of it. It just sort of came out like this.

It makes no sense to you right now but the library description is just my interpretation of what the Hogwarts library looks like. I want it to be as I described it and I don't really care what you think. I'm sorry if that offends anyone. The Problem with Breaking Rules

**By Lurisa**

Some rules are meant to be broken. The rule that said to stay far away from him was definitely not one of those. It was meant to be followed very closely, no exceptions.

So why had I found myself sneaking off to the library at midnight to meet him? Because apparently I'd become so accustom to breaking certain rules that I could no longer distinguish those that can be broken from those that can't. My judgment appeared to have been irrevocably addled.

Slowly I pushed open the door to the library. I couldn't believe I was doing this. I was Headgirl, upholder of the rules and role model to young witches everywhere. Okay, so maybe I'm exaggerating just a smidgen but still…

I closed the door behind me, carefully letting the latch slip quietly back into place. Thank Merlin that those hinges were kept well oiled. At least I didn't have to worry about a squeaky hinge giving away my position. Filch had been waiting since I'd been appointed Headgirl to catch me putting a toe out to line. I swear it'd become a favorite pastime of his. A rather unhealthy pastime.

The library was huge; I mean, truly gargantuan. There were five floors of bookcases filled floor to ceiling with books on every subject imaginable. And its size was not limited to height alone. The center aisle stretched further that I could see—ignoring the fact that it was dark, of course. If one would remove all the bookcases—heaven forbid!—I do believe that my house would have easily fit.

It went without saying that this library contained every book ever printed. On those countless floor-to-ceiling bookcases were copies of every edition of every book ever published and released to the public—and then some. And each book was in almost perfect condition. Amazing really considered just how old some of the books were.

I walked down the center, making my way to the very back of the cavernous room. There was a window strategically placed in each sub-aisle with a small study table before it. Somewhere near the very back of the library at one of those very tables in its own alcove of unused books, he was waiting for me. At least, that's what his note had said.

_I need to talk to you. Meet me in the library at midnight. Very back. You'll find me._

That's all it had said. It wasn't signed or addressed but I had known that it was for me and I'd known who had written it. The same way I had known I shouldn't have been there. And after curfew no less.

"Granger."

I stopped and looked into the alcove I had just passed. There he was, bathed in the moonlight shining through the window looking nothing short of a Greek god. My heart began to race at the sight of him.

Ah, that was the reason I was breaking the rule not meant to be broken. The truth is out. I'm risking house points and the loss of my badge because of the reaction he drew from me. Because of the way my heart raced and my breathing quickened and shivers shot through my body, I was willing to break rules not meant to be broken.

He smiled and got up from the table, quickly enfolding me in his arms. No, this wasn't the first time I had escaped to the library at the late hours of the night. I had been breaking that rule quite often in the last month. I knew that it had to stop, that I couldn't carry on with this rule breaking, but how was I to tell him that? Of course, it should have been a relatively easy thing but you weren't the one wrapped in his arms. There was no thinking straight in a situation such as the one I found myself in.

He placed a soft kiss against my lips. "I missed you."

I'd only been out of his sight for approximately five hours, since dinner had ended at seven. But I had known what he'd meant. I hated the rule that I was breaking when I was with him. The rule that said that we couldn't be together meant that we could only watch from afar and share brief, meaningful glances. I wanted to be at his side during the light of day, to stand beside him where all could see us. But, instead, we were banished to spend only a few short hours in each other's company under the cover of darkness. I hated that blasted rule.

"Come sit with me," he said softly, pulling me gently toward the window seat. I could not find it in me to resist him. The very idea of sitting within the circle of his arms was so alluring…

I sat, surrendering as he pulled me back against the wall of his chest, his hands folded on the flat of my stomach. This was what I waited the entire day for, to be wrapped in his strong arms and feel the strain of the past hours fade away.

My gaze flickered over the moonlit scene outside, our reflection superimposed through the widow. He kissed my cheek.

These were the hours that got me through the day. These precious hours in which I was with him and we could pretend that what we were doing was perfectly acceptable. This cherished span of time where I could love him and he could love me and the world would not come crashing down around us…

Oh, to be back in one of those times in the library. But I will never again feel the warmth of his body, the soft rise and fall of his chest, his gentle lips on mine. There is a reason that that rule was not meant to be broken. It was put there for the sake of my heart. It was there to prevent my heart from being shattered into a million pieces.

If only I had obeyed that rule, I wouldn't cry myself to sleep at night. I wouldn't have trouble waking up in the morning to face another day without him. I wouldn't make enough coffee for two in the morning. I wouldn't become so over come by grief that I'd fall in the middle of my rooms and cry, murmuring his name over and over and not finding the strength within myself to carry on. If only I had followed that bloody rule, I wouldn't feel as though part of me was missing.

Harry had once found me sitting on the kitchen floor and leaning back against the cabinets for support. That morning I'd forced myself to climb out of bed and down into the kitchen with the intent of making myself some coffee. I'd taken two mugs out of the cabinet, set them on the counter and had them each filled—one with milk and sugar and one black—before I'd realized just what I was doing.

There was no one there to catch me when my legs gave out and the grief that I'd thought I'd finally moved past washed over me ten-fold. He wouldn't ever be there to drink his coffee black from his favorite mug while sitting on the kitchen counter ever again. He was gone from my life forever.

How does one deal with the loss of someone that is so dear to you that you don't feel complete without him? How does one go on living? Given the chance, I would've died for him, would've given my life without the slightest bit of hesitation. But I'd never even been given the option to switch places with him…

I remember the moment as clearly as if it was only an hour ago although it has been nearly a year. I was sitting in the living room—in that chair facing the door—waiting for him to come home. I'd known something wasn't right. Something inside me felt…empty, broken. It was raining. A log popped and then Harry and Ron burst through the front door with him held upright between them.

Harry lowered him carefully to the floor. I was at his side in an instant, leaning over his still body, pushing soaked strands of white gold off his face. He was so cold. His breathing was so shallow.

Thunder cracked. It sounded as though it was just outside the open door.

His eyelids fluttered open, his gray eyes fighting to focus on me. "'Mione," he murmured. "…love you."

I caught up his hand and held it to my cheek, trying to hold back my tears. "I love you, too."

Lightning flashed, filling the doorway with it's brilliant light.

I kissed him, slow and passionate.

He smiled a tiny smile against my lips. "Goodbye, love."

"No," I cried, pulling back only far enough to look at him as his eyes drifted closed. "Don't you dare leave me here!"

But he never opened his eyes again. I never again saw his eyes swirl with all the emotion he felt for me. Never again would he look at me and read me like an open book…

Time ceased to pass for me. Around me, others moved on, getting on with their lives. But I was stuck forever in that one day. It was though I was on a time loop. Every morning, every day, every night—always the same thing.

A part of me died with him on that rainy night. It wasn't supposed to be that way. We were going to be married—I still wore the ring to prove it. He had wanted to be the father of my children. We were supposed to grow old together. He wasn't supposed to die that night and leave me to carry on without him…

I'll never regret a moment I was with him. You see, he completed me, made me whole. He alone was the one that could fill the emptiness in my heart. If I hadn't broken that rule, I would never have known what it was like to love someone so completely.

Some rules are meant to be broken. The rule that said to stay far away from Draco Malfoy was one of those…


End file.
